I have had a few conversations with people who have (mostly unintentionally) criticized our decision to adopt. Even after we explain why, they still don’t “get” it. Someone asked recently, “Why does everything you do have to be so hard? Why can’t you just do something the regular way?”
The truth of the matter is that adoption is hard. It’s really hard. Aside from feeling like an oddball for wanting to raise a child who is not biologically “ours”, the process is inherently challenging. There’s a lot of waiting. A lot more paperwork. And it can be full of ups and downs. We know that this isn’t necessarily “the easy way” (though with fertility issues that some couple have to deal with, I’m not sure there is an easy way…). Sometimes I wonder why we can’t expand our family “the other way.”
But here’s reality: We’re not doing this for us. We’re not doing this because we feel like we’re good people if we do this. We’re doing this because God loved us first. Yep, it’s really that simple. God loved us, so we want to love just as He loves. We don’t do this out of vain ambition, to be called “good people.” We don’t do this because we’re bleeding hearts. We don’t do this because we are going save the world. We do this because we feel that in our hearts, God has asked us to be obedient and to care for the orphan (and the widow), to live out Isaiah 1:17 and James 1:27. If our God was willing to pay whatever cost to make us sons and daughters, shouldn’t we likewise wish to sacrifice in our every day lives to glorify Him?
Now, don’t get me wrong, we are so incredibly excited about Baby Shows. We cannot wait to hold Baby Shows and whisper that we’re Baby Shows’ parents. We love becoming parents through adoption. This journey, however challenging, is beautiful.
But the driving motivation for our decision is that He loved us first.
Maybe this just seems radical to you too. We could live like “normal” Christians and do the church thing, passing to get by. We could do the minimum and function just fine, thankyouverymuch. But we don’t want to live that life. We are willing to go beyond the everyday “normal” Christianity because we’re motivated by this love. And I think this leaves people asking, how could any love ever be that great?
You must not know the love of my God, because, simply, it is that great.