From Elisabeth Elliot, The Path through Suffering:
There are so many subtle forms of self to cling to – an insistence on my own judgment; confident in my own resources; an unconscious taking of my own way without even considering others; reluctance to hear a viewpoint opposed to my own; attempts to bring conversation around to my interests. If we ask the Lord to show us our selfishness He will do it – gently, one thing at a time, with help to face and renounce it. But it must sometimes be hard. Our loving Savior understands that perfectly. It is again nature. The cross cuts deep. (p. 101-102).
The cross indeed cuts deep. It cuts away the parts of us that are not producing fruit. The parts which are comfortable. The parts that do not lead to life. A death to self is the calling of a believer.